Fredonia NY October rose (ckg photo)

What is it about being upside down that causes such a rush? Is it the increased blood flow? Is it the heart rest? Is it because Mind rests more easily and fully when the legs are up? Is it more psychological: being upside down forces up to look at the world with a different perspective?

Last night I practiced inversions. Beginning with headstand (sirsasana) where I am still working at moving my legs away from resting upon the wall. This is a years loooong struggle for me.But it took me years to be able to kick up by myself, so the lesson is patience ~ and practice. Being in the unsettled throws of perimenopause, there are many weeks, or months where it is not advisable to practice inversions, so I grow frustrated at my lack of progress. And yet, every breath where my feet are not resting upon the wall I claim as personal victory… over what?  My body or my mind or a bodymind combo that seems intent upon keeping me earthbound when all my heart wants to do is to fly?

Three conscious breaths. That’s all I EVER need. No matter what posture I am inhabiting.

Then I did three pincha mayurasanas without kicking up. You may call these bent arm dogs. An attempt to strengthen my arms for the eventual day when I will be able to kick up! I am resolved to continue the practice, no matter how many years it takes. Then I did one half handstand where the shakes took over and I breathed through them, but then came down into child pose when I felt as if my feet where going to fall off the wall anyway. Can you relate?

Then shoulderstand (sarvangasana) wherein I found a perfect support system ~ ahhh, what joy when the body feels supported and can relax into a pose! I used four blankets folded in quarters and laid one upon the other in a stair step fashion to support my neck and two blankets folded half again laid side by side and angled at one end away from each other making a valley for the neck to drop into with the shoulders supported upon the blankets themselves. A chair placed at the end of my mat provided support for my feet during plough. My back is not feeling particularly strong these days so I scissor kicked one leg at a time down to the chair for ekapada sarvagasana.

I was surprised at the end of the practice that an hour and a half had flown by. All I’d done were four inversions!

A student said today that whenever she practiced legs up the wall, her Mind began to race.  Thanks, but no thanks she said when offered an eye bag. A sandbag placed upon a block with the end resting upon her forehead offered minimal relief. So during this  morning’s class I suggested she try lifting further into an inversion. She is slow and fearful of inversions, so we went for viparita karani with hips supported on a bolster and legs supported as well as ankles belted. Due to persistent hot flashes, we didn’t bother with a blanket tucked around her feet and legs. The set-up did bring her some relief, but we’ll continue working on her moving deeper into inversions. For savasana, I suggested some torso and head support with bolster and blanket.

I’d love to hear how you work inversions into your practice.

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January 11, 2010 FOCUS: Standing Pose Flow

Last night I spent some time writing and pondering my dreams, which has been a theme this month, both at the Comfort Cafe and on  the cool blog I recently discovered, Chris Guillebeau’s The Art of Noncomformity.

In the middle of this quiet activity,a strong tug drew me into the standing poses. David Darling’s musical massage “balance” cd pulled me into a flow: Triangle (Trikonasana), Warrior 2 (Virabhadrasana 2), Right Angle (Parsvakonasana), Half Moon (Ardha Chandrasana), Warrior 3 (Virabhadrasana 3), Warrior 1 (Virabhadrasana 1), Parsvottanasana, and Prasarita.

I practiced each pose on one side and then the other, focusing on creating a graceful flow.

When needed, a block provided support. Wooden or bamboo blocks would have been better suited to my needs because the foam blocks I have are too unstable. Balance was an issue. In part,  because of the double mats I use in the basement. Next time I’ll take my chances with a single mat. On the other hand, being rather unstable pushed me to focus even more.

One of the challenges of practicing a flow is to maintain focus in the body. Awareness of your own movement through space sharpens. There is strength in graceful movement! When Mind wanders, the quivery limbs follow suit and who knows where you’ll end up?

I ended up laughing at myself and my perfection-seeking. Then refocused, and tried the pose again.

My back began feeling the flow, so I went into child pose and then savasana using a bolster beneath my knees, a blanket beneath my head, and a sandbag on my lower abdomen. One of the heavier eye bags placed on my forehead helped quiet my mind.

I often enter a timeless space when practicing deep relaxation, it’s usually much longer than I had sensed. Was surprised last night at the amount of time I had been in corpse. Only ten minutes. My intention had been for a longer stay, at least twenty minutes. Hmmm, maybe use a timer next time. Or not, and just go with the flow of BodyMind consciousness.

What do you think?

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Jan.10, 2010 FOCUS: Seated forward bends and twists

viparita karani, legs up the wall pose

This afternoon I practiced viparita karani (legs up the wall) on my platform bed. At first, I thought I’d put on a cd but then decided against it, so I could enter a more meditative state. What happened was that I entered a more somnambulistic state.

My snoring woke me up 45 minutes later! There is something, some unknown quality, to a yogic nap that never fails to leave me feeling refreshed and wonderful.

Ten minutes of supta baddha konasana in the early evening. Became aware of energy moving upwards from lower torso. A good feeling!

At eleven o’clock I started for the studio for my usual before-bed practice. Just as I was heading down into the basement, there was a phone call from my daughter. What’s a mommy-yogini to do? I didn’t want to ignore my daughter, but I also didn’t want to ignore my practice. So I did both!

Donning headphones, I went to my mat that was already set up and waiting for me, and situated on a folded blanket, I practiced seated forward bends and twists as we chatted.

After our conversation, I sat in baddha konasana and practiced ujjayi breathing. I found it a challenge to lift mula bandha on the exhalation in this pose. Faith! practice will get me there.  I kept my eyes open, gaze about two feet ahead of me on the floor and felt like an island of energy, breathing into the universe.

I struggled keeping my mind focused on the breath, much more so than usual. Perhaps it was the phone call, perhaps it was that Mike came down and began practicing on the other side of the room, perhaps it was due to my eyes being open. I almost never practice pranayama with open eyes, but I have been trying to keep my eyes open throughout my practice these days, in an effort to not drop so deep and still. I am striving to stay present, connected, and aware. Lots of room for growth here!

After the pranayama, I reclined for all three versions of supta padangusthasana (reclined leg lifts, holding the big toe) and supta pascimottanasana (two legs up, holding with a strap). Then I shifted to sphinx, and several cobras, playing with my hand positions. I noticed that as I moved my hands farther back, more in line with my waist, that it was easier to pull my tail/pubic bone down, creating more space in my lower back. A couple of bent-arm dogs to bent-arm planks pumped my blood and got the shakes going. I welcomed these muscle-strengthening shakes, though afterward rewarded myself with an extended balasana, child’s pose.

Time for shoulderstand, sarvangasana. My typical set-up uses three blankets and a mat piece on top. That supports my neck and shoulders. Usually I place a folding chair at the end of my mat for my feet to rest on during halasana, plough pose, but since I had stretched the backs of my legs so much with all of those  forward bends, I decided to push it a bit and use a block. That worked fine.

Savasana. Even though my mind was quite active at the beginning of practice, as I remained in corpse, I traveled deeper and into quieter territory. Sometimes the journey within feels physical. Layer by layer dissolves into …what?…ether?, air?, the universe?,…or do we just let the outer layers slip out of our consciousness, they are there all along but we grow less aware of them? This would describe the yogic limb of PRATYAHARA, or sensory withdrawal.

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What is it that I am waiting for? Why do I think I am not good enough or strong enough or smart enough or beautiful enough or kind enough? Why is the ripeness, the fullness of my existence so difficult to accept?

Why do I think someone is more ~ or less ~ then my self? Why do I not see the wholeness in the world around me?

Why is union so elusive?

There is a beauty and joy as the trees in the northeastern US give up their leaves every fall. The world ripens. My prayer is that I may accept and be grateful for the ripeness that is me ~ that is you. However momentary that may be.

Here is a video produced by A Network for Grateful Living (ANG*L) of Poet Jane Hirshfield performing at the Poetry of Gratefulness event at the Herbst Theatre, San Francisco, CA, February 3, 2008. I recommend a visit to: http://www.gratefulness.org…a non-profit organization dedicated to the practice of gratitude. You may want to check out some of the other very worthwhile videos while you’re there!

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Think your life is too small? Think you need to do something significant, something with impact, something for your children to remember you by? When we start spinning our thoughts in this direction, it’s usually a sign that we need to to chill, breathe for a bit, and as Jen Louden, virtual life coach diva, says in her short film on making meaning, that we need to redirect ourselves and take a SIMPLE STEP toward one desire.

The entire plan is very yogic! We teach SMALL STEPS, whether it’s diet, your practice, your actual asanas, meditation, lifestyle… take it easy and institute one step at a time. Feel the ripples. Let them integrate, then go for the next piece of action.

We teach LOOK AT WHAT YOU ALREADY KNOW. LOOK AT WHAT YOU ALREADY DO. Meditation can help this process; through silence your knowledge will surface. What you need to know will be there. How many times have I ended my meditation and sat in awe at what had surfaced for me? It’s the insights gained that draws me to the cushion over and over again.

Journaling, whether in writing or artwork or both, can be another fantastic aid to uncovering your present state. I can’t count the number of times I had an aha moment while doodling in my journal. Those moments when I’d say: OH, so that’s what I’m REALLY thinking!

‘Nough said! check out COMFORT QUEEN should you wish for more of Jen’s practical wisdom.

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Poetry can be used as a wonderful tool for your meditation. There is a layer of a good poem that is “off the page.” When I teach poetry, I ask my students to try to understand, not only the literal interpretation of a given poem, but also whatever levels they find off the page.

Often, we read this layer with our hearts and have a difficult time explaining that level of the poem to another person; we’ll say it’s hard to put into words or we’ll say “you know” a lot while nodding our heads. It’s the layer of the poem that speaks to us the loudest and with a universal message of what it means to be human. We know, and again it’s a nonverbal knowledge, that the other person understands, or maybe I should say FEELS what it is the poet is trying to convey.

When listening to or reading poetry, RELAX open your heart center, and invite your Self to become the poem. If that sounds too airy-fairy to you, just sit back and softly focus your awareness on each line of the poem.

The first video, created by IshqDaFakeer, contains the lovely Soundtrack: Oceanic (Part 1) by Anoushka Shankar.

Here is the transcription of the poem:

Not Christian or Jew or Muslim, not Hindu
Buddhist, sufi, or zen. Not any religion

or cultural system. I am not from the East
or the West, not out of the ocean or up

from the ground, not natural or ethereal, not
composed of elements at all. I do not exist,

am not an entity in this world or in the next,
did not descend from Adam and Eve or any

origin story. My place is placeless, a trace
of the traceless. Neither body or soul.

I belong to the beloved, have seen the two
worlds as one and that one call to and know,

first, last, outer, inner, only that
breath breathing human being.

The second poem-video, “Say I Am You” was created by rahmama2. The music is by the composer, Eleni Karaindrou, and is the theme music called “Eternity and a Day” from the movie, Aggelopoulos.

And if they don’t speak to you, don’t worry, I’ll post something completely different next week.

After you have “experienced” each video, you may wish to sit quietly with your eyes closed for a few minutes and let them reverberate in your heart and mind. As you do so, welcome whatever bubbles into your awareness consciously. Then let that thought go as you create room for whatever else may come before your mind. Do this as long as you feel comfortable.

If you’re inspired, by all means pick up your pen and paper, or head to your keyboard and let loose. Mevlana would be pleased with your efforts, I’m sure.

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Today we celebrate Nepal’s Tibetan Singing Nun, Ani Choying Dolma. The footage of Ani with the elephant calf is worth the time you’ll invest watching this gorgeous film. But there is so much more beauty here. Settle into your chair, or spread yourself into savasana pose, and invite peace into your life with the sound of Ani’s sweet and comforting voice.

Everything is impermanent; everything shifts like the wind. Peace enters your life to the degree you accept life’s impermanence.

JOURNAL ACTIVITY: (If you haven’t yet, please read the yoga and meditation journaling page)

If you wish to write, you may benefit from creating a list of what you let go of, today, yesterday, last week, last month, last year, and in the life that has past and in the life that is yet to be. Invite peace as Ani’s song to fill your heart as you create your list.

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