It’s ironic that at a workshop titled Inner and Outer Strength, chanting made the strongest impression. Well, maybe not; maybe the hard asana work prepared the channels and enabled an opening as never heretofore experienced? Chanting does require inner strength of the vocal chords and deep release of the diaphragm.
In the white studio, thirty voices intoned OM in thirty different intonations. I, too, opened my mouth and a sound welled from deep in my torso. Gradually it grew louder and pitched higher as I traveled with it:
A – O – U – M.
Up from the belly, into the solar plexus, through the heart center, rising in the throat, finally vibrating between my eyebrows. Then a deep inbreath, opening my mouth – and as I find the deep inner place from which om begins – the sound is released, flying into the flock of oms in the room. Some large and deep, some resonant and harmonic, some high and sweet. All one energy.
Over and over the oms played louder, softer, faster, deeper. Over and over I let them go; I let sound happen through me as if releasing a long pent-up voice.
- chautauqua secret garden bridge
The primordial voice that existed before “I” was, before the universe existed rang outward and inward. Becoming transparent to sound, I tried to hold it, though it never stayed. Without my thinking or expecting, the energy carried me across another bridge.
Eventually there were no more students, or teachers, or moms, professors, midwives, writers, bloggers, musicians, Techies, yogis, gardeners, poets, grammas. The sound erased personas as each voice moved on its own, emanating from ever-deepening channels within.
The vibration filled the room. I was aware of it and not aware of it. Eventually there were no individuals at all. Just sound. A flight of harmonics and energy. There was nothing to do, just keep sounding OOOOooooommmmm.
Like a lover after the fact, the chant eventually would wind down – the vibration still there, though softer. I opened my mouth to receive the sensation which became a fine humming – a string vibrating inside me and in the room. Then the sound was no longer present; sound gave way to silence and I became aware of a vibrant ringing, maybe my body was rocking, but I am not sure. Waves of energy throbbed and passed through me. All was vibration and nothing else. My body had become a bell and in all directions there was ringing.
- Panterra garden buddha
Existence made sense. There was no denying that I was alive and that being alive equaled this bliss.